Super Tuesday saw the Democratic presidential candidate race narrowed down to two, Trevor Noah noted. “It was a long way from the original 6,000.”
Noah expressed condolences to Elizabeth Warren, who failed to pick up a single state, including her home state of Massachusetts, coming in third. “It’s like your parents have replaced you with another child. ‘Sorry, honey. We want Joe Biden to be our daughter now.'”
Mike Bloomberg was another loser on the night. Noah mocked the ex-Mayor’s speech on how he accomplished something even though he didn’t win. “We spent half a billion dollars to absolutely eat shit! They said it couldn’t be done, but we did it!
Bloomberg spent more than half-a-billion dollars on television ads, “But I spent nothing,” Noah chortled. “So I feel like I saved $500 million.”
As for Joe Biden, “He hasn’t been that happy since Obama taught him how to ride a bike.” Although the night was not complete without a Biden gaffe, as he mistook his sister for his wife. “If you’re going to call your sister your wife, you should have done it sooner,” Noah said. “You might have won Utah.”