After decades of countless lies, deeply stupid acts of grandstanding, and ferocious loyalty to criminals and losers, Roger Stone finally is getting credit “for sh*t he actually did,” Samantha Bee celebrated on Full Frontal.
Roger Stone was arrested in a pre-dawn raid on his Florida home last week, and indicted by a grand jury on charges brought by Special Counsel Robert Mueller.
The FBI had to do their raid early in the morning “because that’s when Roger Stone gets back into his coffin for the day” Bee gleefully cheap-shotted.
Bee told her viewers they may know Stone from his work as a Republican, his Bond villain outfits or the tattoo of Richard Nixon he has on his back.
He was arrested for lying to Congress about the fact he communicated with Wikileaks at the request of someone in the Trump campaign; also on a witness tampering charge for telling his alleged co-conspirator to do “a Frank Pentangeli.“ Stone may fancy himself the Robert Duvall of The Godfather franchise but, in truth, he’s the horse, Bee snarked.
“The coverup is the crime!” she ranted. “He would have known that if he had asked his tattoo!”
For decades, Stone has proclaimed himself a political genius, “a high powered trickster merrily owning the libs,” Bee described, noting that, in a documentary he described himself as “an agent provocateur” who cut his teeth at age 19 as one of Richard Nixon’s dirty tricksters. When Watergate happened, it got him the one thing he really craves: attention.
Actually, Stone is a guy who just shows up whenever things are getting dirty, Bee explained. “He’s more like America’s athletes foot.”
Though Stone loves to claim credit for awful things he might not really have done, this time he’s got credit due, being the guy whose idea it was for Trump to run for POTUS – three times.
All Roger Stone has ever wanted is to be is in the center of it all. Now, it’s finally happened to him. But, based on his whining about his arrest – he claims the FBI stormed his house with “greater force than used to take down Bin Laden” – it turns out not to be as fun as he had thought, Bee concluded.