It says something about our standards these days that a “pretty good week” includes a blockbuster New York Times investigation about Trump possibly having committed massive tax fraud, and boarding Air Force One after a rally with toilet paper stuck to his shoe which, Oliver called “objectively funny,” “unsurprising” and “totally on brand” for our president.
Big news for the recently wrapped week was Brett Kavanagh’s confirmation, guaranteed when Sen. Susan Collins announced she was giving him a “yes” vote – a decision Wall Street Journal editorial page disgustingly, and also unsurprisingly, headlined, “Susan Collins Consents.”
Trump, who previously had said he found Christine Blasey Ford, who had accused Kavanaugh of sexual assault in high school, to be credible, but then made fun of her at rally, and argued that men are the real victims.
What became painfully clear, Oliver acknowledged, was that, at no step in Kavanaugh’s confirmation, was there any chance of altering Republicans’ course: not Ford’s testimony, not the wildly inadequate FBI investigation, not the letter signed by 2,400 law professors opposing Kavanaugh’s appointment, not retired Supreme Court Justice John Paul Stevens who said that, after watching Kavanaugh’s testimony, he no longer felt Kavanaugh was fit for the country’s top court.
But no one, Oliver argued, embodied the Republican party’s indifference better than Sen. Orrin Hatch, who told protesters to “grow up” and waved dismissively at them. Even setting aside the spectacular condescension of telling adult women
to “grow up,” “that wave is a pretty clear ‘F*ck you’,” Oliver spelled out.
Also utterly shameless in his commitment to bad-faith argument, Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell accused Democrats of being obstructionist – really rich given that McConnell blocked Merrick Garland from getting the Supreme Court seat. McConnell bragged that one of his proudest moments of his life was when he looked President Obama in the eye and said “Mr. President, you will not fill this Supreme Court vacancy.”
Oliver speculated it would be a pretty awkward for the McConnell family at Thanksgiving when he explains to his three sons how they are nothing compared to “that one time he was a dick to The Cool President.”
Meanwhile, Sen. Chuck Grassley, who heads the Senate Judiciary Committee, whined about what he said were falsehoods
being spread about Kavanaugh. But, when presented by Fox News’s Maria Bartiromo with a baseless conspiracy theory about the protesters who argued with GOP Sen. Jeff Flake in an elevator, Grassley signed-on immediately.
“So many people believe it I tend to believe it,” Grassley beamed of Bartiromo’s theory George Soros was behind the protesters. Oliver stated the obvious: no one has to pay people to yell at Flake; they would do it for free.
Finally, someone on television covering Kavanaugh’s appointment dared to say Sen. Susan Collins’ decision to give Kavanaugh a thumbs-up was NOT even remotely surprising. “She disappoints at a rate normally associated with dinners cooked by
divorced dads,” Oliver noted, accurately.
Collins, Oliver further argued, engaged in “spectacular bad-faith bullshit.” Announcing her decision, she huffed and puffed indignantly about what she called the boatload of “dark money” spent opposing Kavanaugh’s appointment which she charged had corrupted this process.
Except, Oliver pointed out, of the $9M spent on special-interest ads about the process, about $7M was spent in support of Kavanaugh – more than half of that coming from right-wing Judicial Crisis Network.
“This entire process wasn’t about principle; it was about getting what you want, no matter how you have to do it, or what damage it does to…fundamental trust in the Supreme Court,” Oliver scolded. “It was borderline pathological” which, Oliver said, brings things back around to Trump, naturally.
At a rally In Minnesota, his win at all cost philosophy was laid “terrifyingly” bare, when he made fun of Al Franken, who resigned as senator after multiple accusations of misconduct. Trump knocked him, not for what he had done, “but for being dumb enough to take responsibility for it.”
Trump has gotten away with so much in his life, for so long, he mocked the very idea of accountability. And his base loved it.
“I bet in the Trump household, the board game ‘Sorry’ is just called ‘Pussy’,” Oliver snarked.