UPDATED with video of full interview: Stephen Colbert wondered if fired FBI Director James Comey was surprised he got fired by President Donald Trump, as he and Comey drank wine and chatted on Tuesday’s Late Show [Watch full interview below].
“If you felt you were working for a mob boss, were you surprised you got whacked? Cause that’s what they do.” Colbert said, which we guarantee is not how George Stephanopopulos put the question when he got first crack at interviewing Comey as he promotes his new book, “A Higher Loyalty: Truth, Lies, and Leadership.”
“I actually was quire surprised,” Comey confessed, “because I thought, I’m leading the Russia investigation. Even though our relationship was becoming strained, there’s no way I’m going to get fired or whacked,” Comey said, explaining, “that would be a crazy things to do. Why would you fire the FBI director whose leading the Russia investigation?”
“Because you are leading the Russia investigation!” Colbert countered. “I don’t know if you’ve dealt with mob bosses before, but they don’t like to be investigated.”
Trump, of course, did whack Comey, then told NBC News’s Lester Holt on national TV that the Russian probe played a role in his decision.
Changing subjects, sort of, Colbert wondered if Comey knew things about the Russia probe of which the public is not yet aware.
“Yes,” Comey said, maybe speaking to an audience of one, down a Mar-a-Lago.
Colbert wanted to hear.
“It’s not in the book and I can’t talk about it,” Comey said, disappointing everyone in the Ed Sullivan Theater.
“Okay. Drink some more wine,” Colbert urged.
Colbert gave Comey the opportunity to weigh in on all the “fun things” President Trump has tweeted about him as his book was being released to the public, including “Slippery Jim” and “slime ball.”
“He’s tweeted at me probably 50 times. I’ve been gone for a year. I’m like a breakup he an’t get over,” Comey smiled, getting huge applause from Colbert’s crowd.
“I’m out there living my best life; he wakes up in the morning and tweets at me,” Comey added.
Colbert reminded Comey he had visited the Presidential Suite in the Moscow Ritz where Trump is rumored to have been recorded by Russian authorities hanging out with two prostitutes who urinated on the bed previously slept in by Former President Barack Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama when they vistited the city. Colbert wondered if Comey, who famously had to inform Trump of the taping reports, if he wanted to ask him any questions about the suite.
“Is it big enough for a germaphobe to be safe from the activity?” Comey asked.
Colbert assured him the bedroom is “very long” and “you could definitely be out of what we call at Seaworld The Splash Zone.”
When asked, Comey said he had not actually spelled out the whole golden-shower part of the Steele Dossier, and Trump interrupted him to ask if he looked like a guy who needed the service of hookers.
Colbert began to vigorously nod his head in the affirmative, saying, “I want to be delicate here but he looks like a microwaved circus peanut that somebody rubbed on a Golden Retriever.”
Comey had another drink.
Full, uncut interview: