The magical, wonderful road to impeachment should be a slam dunk for conviction, Trevor Noah claimed, given the overwhelming evidence that constitutes “a competent, compelling case,” he said.
“It’s like having a murder suspect who left DNA and a bloody glove at the scene and fled in a Ford Bronco…wait, that happened?”
No, the Trump impeachment trial outcome is pretty much foreordained, Noah admitted. But meanwhile, there’s a crazy “trial” underway. Former President Donald Trump’s lawyers are so scattered, “They never addressed key issues, one guy cried reading a poem,” Noah said. “I thought Ted Cruz was going to start another insurrection in order to change the subject.”
Republicans were perplexed that the lawyers were so incompetent, expressing exasperation at the lack of organization.
“Do you know how bad a job they’re doing that even Lindsey Graham turned on them? It’s like drawing something so bad your Kindergarten teacher dogs you for it!”
Of course, nobody was more upset by the non-performance “than the man who was never going to pay them anyway,” Noah said. He reported on stories indicating Trump was yelling at the TV. “If he thinks you’re rambling, you know you f*cked up,” Noah said.
Still, no matter how bad the defense is, it will all still make for a very inspiring movie, Noah said. Watch the clip below for what that may look like.
The impeachment trial continues, and nobody is more upset about Trump’s s**ty lawyers than the man who was never gonna pay them anyway. pic.twitter.com/LqQJm7h1g2
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