Ukraine Hostages Released After President Agrees To Promote Joaquin Phoenix Movie

Thirteen hostages in Ukraine have been released unharmed after President Volodymyr Zelenskiy agreed to the kidnapper’s demand that he recommend an animal rights documentary narrated by Joaquin Phoenix.

The hostage-taker was armed with guns and a grenade when he took over a bus, sparking a 12-hour standoff with police.

According to local reports, the state security service identified him as 44-year-old Maksym Kryvosh, an animal rights activist with a criminal record for gun possession.

In a bizarre twist, one of his demands was that Zelenskiy promote 2005 documentary Earthlings, a critique of mankind’s use of animals as pets, food, clothing, entertainment and for scientific research.

The Ukrainian President did so via a six-second clip posted on the presidential Facebook page, which was subsequently deleted.