Stephen Colbert, Trevor Noah Get Religion On The Coronavirus Outbreak

Stephen Colbert noted at the top of his monologue that “I, for one, am not panicking.” But some people are panicking over the coronavirus: namely, Wall Street.

President Donald Trump spoke to the nation the other night, Colbert noted, to reassure nervous investors. “Today, it bounced back by plunging almost 1,200 points, the largest single drop in US history.”

Colbert felt the pain of Wall Street brokers. “If only they had access to some sort of drug that would make them feel better, then made them think they could start a band.”

One other potential panacea is a bit of that old-time religion. Watch the clip for details.

The Daily Show with Trevor Noah noted how Japan is closing its schools for a month because of the coronavirus. The good news? “Now America has a chance to catch up in math!”

Noah noted there is one major winner from the coronavirus: Netflix. He noted, if you’ve been binging for a while with Netflix, a screen will pop up, “Are you still watching?”  Maybe it should ask, “Are you still alive?”