After a roller-coaster week in politics, including President Donald Trump’s second State of the Union address, Saturday Night Live had an abundance of material for this weekend’s cold open. But before briefly touching on Trump’s speech, the show kicked off with a look at Amazon owner Jeff Bezos’ skirmish with National Enquirer corporate boss David Pecker.
In a take on Meet the Press, the panelists debated the size and color of what Bezos’ penis might look like in nude pictures the tabloid reportedly obtained and used to blackmail the billionaire over his affair with former Los Angeles newscaster Lauren Sanchez.
While the MTP panelists called the entire issue “a new low in journalism,” they couldn’t help but dissect the salacious story and the tabloid headlines it inspired.
“What do you think the coloration is like?” SNL castmember Kyle Mooney asked about Bezos’ manhood, in a turn as MTP moderator Chuck Todd.
“When I hear billionaire’s penis, I immediately think small potatoes,” said Cecily Strong, as Wall Street Journal columnist Peggy Noonan. “Like they say, ‘If it’s small and looks funny, you better have the money, honey.’ “
The segment also included the one-liner — “your Amazon package is on its way,” delivered by Kenan Thompson in a turn as Washington Post columnist Eugene Robinson. Thompson held up a mock-up of the New York Post, with the package line splashed across the front page.
“What is happening right now,” yelled a shocked Leslie Jones, as Democratic strategist Donna Brazile.
The cold open also saw Aidy Bryant play Acting U.S. Attorney General Matt Whitaker and Kate McKinnon as Commerce Secretary Wilbur Ross. Watch it above.
Singer-songwriter Halsey hosted this weekend’s episode, and served as her own musical guest. The 24-year-old New Jersey native last appeared on SNL in November 2018, when she teamed up with Lil Wayne for a performance of the New Orleans rapper’s single Can’t Be Broken from his latest album, Tha Carter V.
Next weekend, Don Cheadle is set to host the NBC sketch comedy series, with blues musician Gary Clark Jr. the musical guest.