Updated with video Did you really think Alec Baldwin could just hold it in? For Saturday Night Live‘s cold open tonight, the actor, reprising his Donald Trump, let loose with a cascade of pee jokes to zing the president-elect over those unconfirmed allegations of some very wet Russian hijinks.
“I am going to bring back a thick stream of jobs to this country,” Baldwin’s Trump promised during a “rebroadcast” of the press conference from earlier this week. “This country will literally be showered with jobs. Because I’m a major wiz at jobs.”
After a mention of the “golden opportunities” awaiting the country, the sketch’s presser moved on to Obamacare (“a disaster and I actually do have a replacement plan – it’s called the Affordable Care Act”), Buzzfeed (“You’re a failing pile of garbage, I took your quiz yesterday and I’ll tell you right now I’m not a Joey, I’m a Rachel!”), and Steve Harvey (played by Kenan Thompson: “Does this bode well for our country? Survey says…”).
After a quick (and welcome) reappearance of Mikey Day and Alex Moffat as Trump’s sons (“Beavis and Butt-Head,” per Donald), a shirtless Beck Bennett reprised his Vladimir Putin, claiming to be Wolf Blitzer and holding up a blackmail-worthy VHS tape and asking Trump if he was “very, very sure” Russia did the hacking.
As for the real-Trump’s upcoming inaugural celebration, fake-Trump promised such big names as Angelina Jolie and Jennifer Lawrence, “courtesy of Madame Tussauds.”
And finally, just before the “Live from New York, it’s Saturday Night,” Baldwin closed the press conference with “Thanks for peeing here.” Of course he did.
Tonight’s episode is hosted by Felicity Jones, the Rogue One: A Star Wars actress who was joined in the opening monologue by Tina Fey as Princess Leia, SNL‘s second Carrie Fisher tribute of the night: Earlier, NBC reran a Fisher-hosted episode from 1978.