“Recently we’ve been talking — a lot — about a certain Republican presidential candidate, whose campaign has captured America’s inability to turn away from spectacular man-made disasters,” Stewart acknowledged at the top of last night’s show. He told disappointed studio audience it was time to move on from his obsession with Donald Trump’s presidential campaign because, “Much like incessant masturbation, eventually you feel a deep sense of shame. Not enough to stop you from doing it entirely, but enough to slow you down a bit.”

“My point is this, our incessant Trump-gazing has caused us to miss important non-Trump news,” Stewart admitted – which put the faux newsman ahead of many of his actual-news competitors.