A few days ago, alert readers tipped me to this Craigslist ad that went up Monday night, “Network television situation comedy seeks non-WGA humor writers to write scripts for weekly network series during the current strike. Salary negotiable.” Turns out the ad was phony and placed by a reporter for the New York Press. Some 80+ responses came in within 24 hours. “It’s a funny/sad exposé of the willingness of young, desperate comedy writers to break into the tv business, on the backs of striking union members,” the paper’s editor-in-chief David Blum emailed me. Some applicants:
Hi! What series would I be scabbing for?
Hello: I am a scab.
But I’m funny.
Please send more details about this opportunity.
Don’t pick on me.
I am a scab.
Hi, I’m a comedy writer interested in learning more about your needs. Can I do it anonymously so I don’t get in trouble with the WGA or anyone else for that matter?
We’re writers of a number of comedies, including independent films, original screenplays and sitcoms….don’t feel sorry for the WGA writers one bit….thanks.
I will be a scab.
Hi, Do you require that the person is living in NY/USA? I do not live in the USA. Currently I live in Asia. I am interested in the sitcom writers job if I can do it over the Internet. I await your reply.
i’m not associted [sic] with the WGA….
who are you? information from you gets you information from me.
Hello, Let me cut to the chase, my name is [REDACTED] and I am damn fine writer…
Hi There, My name is [REDACTED] and I am a cracker-jack comedy writer with a warm, collaborative style… Personally, I enjoy traveling, long walks on the beach, harrowing weather, Dexter, and clams on the half and peppermint chicklets.
Hello, My name is [REDACTED]….I am a [REDACTED]. I am also a capable writer. I watched the strike in person and those people aren’t funny. I currently make $300-$500 a day so pay would have to be in that range….My wife has her masters degree so that means I’m smart!!!
To Whom It May Concern,
I am very interested in writing for your television network. I have an imagination that stretches extremely wide, my writing has a stylish edge to it and my wit can knife right through you.
By late Monday evening at least one applicant had regained her conscience, having applied only hours earlier for the phantom job:
Hi – I’ve been haunted all day by my response to your ad – even if you would contact little ol’ me, I just can’t do it! I have to support the guild writers! Good luck with your show.
And then there was the moral high ground of this emailer:
Does the word SCAB mean anything to you? Yes, please, let me get blacklisted before I even start, that’d be awesome.