Just remember, you heard it here first: I predict Jerry Seinfeld will be next year’s Oscar host, and he’ll have the gig for several years. His memorable appearance on the 79th Academy Awards was tantamount to an audition — not just to see if the show liked him, but to see if he liked the show. After all, with his Seinfeld gazillions, he certainly doesn’t have to impress anyone. He looked cool and comfortable onstage, as if he worked that gig all the time. For awhile now, the Academy has been loathe to hire TV personalities with no cinema profile to emcee the reel world’s most important night of the year. But, in Jerry’s case, ABC would be beyond thrilled. Did you notice how Seinfeld made a point of justifying his appearance by reminding the audience that he starred in that Miramax documentary Comedian? (The pic followed his ability, or inability, to put together a new stand-up routine from scratch.) That said, how strange that he didn’t plug his upcoming animated Bee Movie which he’s not only voicing but also producing for DreamWorks. So now that he’s officially boasting movie bonafides, he could be cleared to take over as Oscar host. What would be great about Seinfeld emceeing is that he’s the essence of autonomy: he’d ignore the show producers trying to control him and everyone else. (They always try to terrorize the hosts, to the detriment of creativity and comedy.) Seinfeld would just do his own thing, the consequences be damned. I’m certain the Academy threw a fit when they heard Jerry last night dissing cineplexes. (“In movie theaters now, they’re trying to get you to pick up the garbage around your seat. I’m picking nothing up. I’m the one who threw it down. How many different jobs do I have to do?” Then he accuses the movie theater owners: “You rip us off on overpriced crap.” Now, an Oklahoma theater owner has scolded Seinfeld and set him straight on the facts.) Or referring to the documentaries as “depressing movies”. But, hey, it’s Jerry! Jerry Seinfeld! And my nominee for hosting the 80th Oscars in 2008. The line to draft him forms here.
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