UPDATED with video: Donald Trump marked the first 100 days of his administration with a series of interviews, telling Reuters thought being POTUS would be easier than being a real estate developer/reality show host, and missed his old life.

“We all do sir,” Stephen Colbert said at the top of Monday’s Late Show.

But the “official defining 100 days interview took place right here in CBS,” Colbert boasted, during which, when asked if he still stands by his claim that President Obama had wiretapped Trump Tower during the election responded, ” I don’t stand by anything.”

“It’s true, Colbert said. “He doesn’t stand by anything except the dressing room door of the Miss USA Pageant,” Colbert snarked, adding, “Based on a true story that joke.”

Colbert had many things to say to Trump, hours after CBS News played that interview, in which Trump insulted its Face the Nation anchor John Dickerson more than once.

During the interview, Trump accused Dickerson of spreading “fake news” and said he liked to call the Dickerson-hosted Sunday Beltway show “Deface the Nation.”

CBS News

Dickerson declined to wilt when Trump made dismissive remarks while dancing around that question as to whether he continues to stand by his unsubstantiated wiretap claim.  

When Trump insisted they each were entitled to their opinion on the subject, Dickerson explained to Trump that he’s POTUS, while reporting Dickerson’s opinion might fall under “fake news.” In response to which, Trump did a great impression of Alec Baldwin on SNL, declaring the interview over and retreating behind his Oval Office desk.

“Walking out … wasn’t even the president’s biggest insult” to Dickerson, Colbert told his studio audience, by way of setting up what was to follow.

“John Dickerson is a fair-minded journalist and one of the most competent people who will ever walk into your office. And you treat him like that?” Colbert said, addressing Trump.

“Let me introduce you to something we call The Tiffany Way,” he said. “When you insult one member of the CBS family you insult us all.”

And then, he got down to business:

– Mr. Trump, I love your presidency. I call it Disgrace the Nation.

– You’re not the POTUS; you’re the BLOTUS. You’re a regular Gorge Washington.

– Sir, you a track more skinheads than free Rogaine.

– You have more people marching against you than cancer.

– You talk like a sign-language gorilla that got hit in the head. In fact, the only thing your mouth is good for is being Vladimir Putin’s c*ck holster.

But, even before the monologue, Colbert conducted his own 100-day milestone interview with Trump, for his Monday show’s cold open: