UPDATE: The Hunger Games: Catching Fire just beat out such films as Oscar winner 12 Years A Slave and The Wolf Of Wall Street for Movie Of The Year in the conclusion of the MTV Movie Awards. Even though Johnny Depp presented, the award was accepted by Josh Hutcherson. Nobody else showed up. Yowza.
EARLIER: So what’s happening in the vitally important MTV Movie Awards? Well, Conan O’Brien–who would win if there was an award for Most Screwed Over For Network Late Night Slot after guys who came behind him have the big network gigs while he’s still the best show on TBS–took the stage on a design that seemed to be inspired by where the Sleestaks lived on Land Of The Lost. I can tell you Jared Leto won Best On-Screen Transformation for getting dolled up for Dallas Buyers Club (I bet he puts the popcorn trophy right next to Oscar on his mantle), and that We’re The Millers’ Will Poulter won for Breakthrough Performance, with Zac Efron beating out some hunks for Best Shirtless Performance and Channing Tatum for Trailblazer Award. And Jonah Hill won some award… You know what? The Yankees are right now playing the Boston Red Sox, and they’re winning and it’s Jeter’s final season. And Game Of Thrones is coming on and trust me, there will be blood. I’m sort of in charge here and screw it, I can’t watch this MTV crapfest any longer. We’ll update the coveted prizes and report on any fist fights and shoving matches if they happen, and post the summer movie trailers which seem to be the whole point of this mostly irrelevant event. Outside of that, you’re on your own.